Thursday, August 20, 2009

Open Letter to Woman Whom I So Wrongfully Offended Today

Dear Madam,

I sincerely apologize for being so offensive today. I am humiliated, as you probably are as well--all my fault, of course. When you told me you were taking "the 9 year old to Antarctica" I made the poor assumption that it was your grandchild and the even worse decision to verbalize that thought. MY. BAD. I hope you and your DAUGHTER have a great time exploring cold terrain together. Maybe it will be so cold that this encounter between us will somehow be frozen from your memory and you'll forget all about my enormous faux pas. I'm also sorry that this occurred in front of your BFF, who swore to heckle you about it for years to come. Maybe you could take her to Antarctica too--and leave her there, since she doesn't seem like much of a BFF. (And I totally do not recommend myself as her replacement, obviously.)

In closing, while I know you are my husband's superior, I do hope that the disconnect in my brain t0 mouth wiring will not reflect poorly on his position in the office.



Anyways, maybe we can still be friends?



Double Kiss, Double Hugs, TRIPLE apologies,

L.

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